A quiet day.

There are days that I would love to get a lot done, today was not one of those days. I woke up so snuggly and warm I had no desire to get out of bed, eventually I did drag my self up and was productive. My plan was to go for a short hike today and I did eventually get out on the trail but I did not do much hiking. In fact, I doubt I did more than a mile.

What I did was relax. I set up my hammock, wrote in my journal, read, and enjoyed the sound of the waterfall in the background. I was not directly off the trail so on a quiet day like today this spot was empty. I wish the weather had been just slightly warmer, because after about an hour and a half I was cold so I decided to pack up. I am sure I should have done a few more miles, but I was so relaxed I just hiked back along the water to my car.

I am sure I should have done more. There is laundry to be folded and cleaning that should have been done. The list goes on and on, but I regret nothing because sometimes lazy days like this help to balance out the insane ones. Over all I did get a few things done today that I needed to and sometimes a little goes a long way.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

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Trail 2A.

Fall is officially here. My hike today was a little chilly at times, but it was still a wonderful adventure. I managed to hit my favorite spot when the sun was out. It is strange to think about how much I will miss the little oasis off of trail 2B with its trees perfectly spaced for hammocks and sunshine filtering through the trees. It is wonderful place to relax, journal and read for a bit.

I am very glad I took advantage of the day. Being outside is always a good way to reset after a week with my face stuck to a computer screen. While I am on the trails my brain is able to look at things differently and find a kind of peace. Unfortunately, the peace does not alway stick, but it is always nice while it lasts.

Tonight I go to bed sore, tired, inspired and happy. What more could I ask for?

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

Weather.

I am torn between staying home in my pj’s all day tomorrow and going hiking. As much as I would really like a lazy day where moving is optional, I think hiking is the wiser choice. Nice weekends are numbered, before I know it there will be snow on the ground and plenty of time to relax. Hopefully we can get through October with some decent weather. Who knows, maybe we will get lucky and it will extend all the way through December like it has the past few years.

No matter when the weather will turn, I need to start making lists of things I want to get done when the weather turns cold. There are many things I have been putting off or have not taken the proper time to do this summer. There is a quilt to finish and journaling to be done. Cookies and cakes to be made and I am sure a thing or two to clean. Not to mention the books I would love to read and the movies/shows to watch.

This summer I set a goal for myself to hike as much as I could. It helped me to have something to look forward to completing and I would like to continue that trend of self encouragement and completing goals.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

Appreciating every moment of now.

I was walking down a trail heading back to my car today and something hit me. I was sweaty and smelly, tired and hungry and I was suddenly so proud of myself. Pretty much every weekend all summer long I have gone on adventures. I have hiked trail after trail and found a few magical places and I have learned so much about myself.

In the past I always wanted a summer like this, weekends spent outside, not being scared to make memories by myself. I always thought this would be the life I would have when I was with someone, I guess in some ways I put my life on hold waiting to not be alone. Not to say there are not many, many times this summer that I wish I had someone by my side, but I guess I have finally realized that putting off doing what I love does nothing to help me grow and become a better person.

Someday I hope I will have someone excited to hike trail after trail with me and make memories that will mean so much to both of us. At the moment that idea is just a flicker of hope in the distance that I will continue moving toward while appreciating every moment of now.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

When vacation ends.

Today marks the end of my lovely vacation. I hiked, spent time with family, slept in and finished with a day of cleaning. It is never fun going back to work after a vacation, but I feel like I will start on the best foot possible. True, I did not get everything done I had hoped, but the most important things were completed. As a bonus I can come home after a long day tomorrow and know that I can relax and not have to stress over a mess.

Vacations are still a little odd for me, really anything that would have been an “us decision” or time spent together is strange. 99.9% of things is getting easier, but I feel like that .1% continues to haunt me more than I like. Some nights I have issues making dinner for myself or deciding what to watch. I know I have come so very far in the healing process, but sometimes it feels like I have gone no where. It is all about baby steps and taking a nice deep breath when things get rough. Hopefully I can continue to remember that.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

Days off.

I feel like I am getting a double vacation!

It started with a wonderful weekend at my Aunt and Uncles and up to my cousins. Time spent with family is always wonderful. Now I have two more glorious days with no work and no major obligations. True I have a seemingly endless list of things that should get done, but going to work is not on it.

First on my list is sleeping in then taking advantage of the beautiful weather predicted for tomorrow. Of course this means hiking and possibly some time in my hammock. Hopefully I will get caught up in my journal and maybe even get the dishes done. There is laundry to fold and floors to clean, but most importantly there are cats to cuddle and relaxing to be done.

It has been such a long time since I have had so many days off in a row, I can hardly contain myself for the excitement!

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

My not so little cousin. 

Time flies, it is honestly insane how fast it goes. 12 years ago on Tuesday one of my little cousins was born, but I guess I can not call her little any more. She has grown into such a beautiful creative person, and I was excited to be able to celebrate her birthday today. It was a wonderful adventure and great time spent with family. 

There were so many wonderful parts of the day, it is impossible to name a favorite. She was excited about each of her presents. We took a walk in the woods. I ate a peach right off the tree. We saw the pigs and chickens they are raising. She showed me her little art studio and we talked so much about this and that. Spending time with kids is simply the best. 

I wish I lived closer so I could spend more time with them, but unfortunately the five hour drive is too much to make all the time. For now I can’t wait for thanksgiving to spend more time with them all. 

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

The last hike of August.

I am loving my Saturday hikes. They give me a chance to relax and see things from a different perspective. Being on trials is my reset button from all the emotions and stress that creeps in over the week. No matter how hard I try it seems to be impossible to not experience some level of frustration over the unexpected path my life has taken. When I am on the trails I choose the path, and I always try to choose the one less traveled.

Today I went further than I had anticipated, somewhere around 8 miles. The trails were so peaceful I did not want to stop, but unfortunately the days are getting shorter so I knew I wanted to be home long before it got dark. I am sad to say that beautifully sunny weekends are numbered. There were more colorful fall leaves on the ground today than I had anticipated. It was a little bitter-sweet. They are so beautiful, but I am not ready to let go of warm sunny days.

For a while today I sat on the sunny bank of the river with my journal catching up on past hikes and documenting a bit of today. While I was there a father was playing with his young children in the water. It was fun to hear their excitement over finding little creatures under rocks. As much as I enjoy empty trails, sometimes it is fun to watch others enjoy the day.

Today was the last hike of August, but I know September will hold more adventures and I can not wait to see what happens.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

Change.

As every season passes I have a difficult time not dwelling on what I do not have. Sometimes I feel surrounded by fading reminders of what is no longer. It is crazy how long shadows of our past haunt us, fortunately not all the shadows are bad. I often remind myself that just because something ended in disaster does not mean the journey was not worth it. Change is not all bad as long as you look at the new opportunities that it brings and not the fear.

Right now I am not ready for the weather to turn into fall. I feel like I finally got used to summer and suddenly everything is changing. On the other hand fall brings with it new adventures that I look forward to every year. There are few thing better than curling up on the couch on a cool day with a blanket and a good book or movie. I look forward to cooler weather for longer runs and deeper sleeps. Soon the leaves will change for beautiful hikes and colorful adventures.

The stronger me knows that good things are coming.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

The pond.

It was so wonderful to have a relaxing day today. I slept in a little longer than I had planned, but that is ok. Most of my day was spent hiking. The weather was perfect for most of the day, so I was surprised how empty the trails were. At the same time I choose to go on trails that are not as popular because they do not run along the river and falls. It is nice to be alone, but as much as I like going at my own pace on whatever trail I want, sometimes I wish someone was with me to share the experience.

I think my favorite part of the hike was when I came across a little calm pond. Everything about it looked out-of-place. The trees that surrounded it were not like most of the other trees on the trail, it really felt like I stepped through a portal into a different world. The ground was covered in moss and everything felt so still. Of course I took the opportunity to set up my hammock, relax, journal and take it all in. I was sad when I felt the weather starting to change and decided I should probably pack up and continue on before the rain started. At some point I will have to find my way back to this spot and take more time to soak in the beauty of it.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.