This week has felt long and painful. I honestly can not pin point the trigger for the emotional battle I was facing. I have a feeling it was a combination of a few things. What caused it does not really matter, what does make a difference is how I have carried myself through it. Out of no where tears came, sometimes I let them flow, other times I had to hold them back. I had sleepless nights, and a total lack of motivation.
After mustering all the motivation I had, I went for a hike today. It was great to be outside, even if it was a bit of a gloomy day. There were a few times that I was teary eyed as I remembered hiking with him, but for the most part it was a wonderful adventure. After hiking a few miles I set up my hammock, I laid around for a bit slowly rocking back and forth listening to the stream flow by. I took the opportunity to write in my prayer journal and pour the pain I have been feeling into the pages and up to God. The last sentence I wrote was “Right now my prayer is for sense of peace, even in the pain”.
I understand the pain is necessary to heal and grow, but that does not mean it is impossible to find peace in it and it is important to ask God to help carry you through. It never ceases to amaze me how quickly God can work. Not long after I packed up my hammock and started to hike down the trail the sun came out, the sky was blue and peace rushed over me. The little things I had been thinking about were no longer there and I was able to put things in a better perspective.
Who knows what challenges will come up tomorrow or the next day, what I do know is God is always there wanting to send us love and support. True it does not always come in the form of sunshine, but He always sends us what we need to make it through.
Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.
Pocket Prayer Journals can be found at Grace & Salt Ink.