With great pain, comes great reward.

I have spent the past few months questioning myself about everything. Wondering where my judgement was lacking and when my blindness set in. I don’t want to think that it was not love, because I think it was, it simply was not true love. Which always leads me to the question of how do you know when it is true?

The farther I get from the fated day somethings are clearer, while others have gotten blurry. This week I caught myself a few times thinking about him and how I loved him. Every once in a while I wish I could find a way to remove the emotions from each memory of him. Then I remember with great pain, comes great reward. I still have a lot of pain to get through before my reward. I doubt I will ever look back on this time of recovery with pleasure, but I hope I can look back on it with pride.

Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.

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