A strange thing happened today. I thought of something I wanted to text him. It was nothing bad, just a trailing thought about my day, something I would have sent him when we were still together. I had it composed in my head and planned to end it with “I love you”. I got as far as picking up my phone before I realized I don’t talk to him any more and I am not supposed to love him.
It still amazes me to think of how much has changed in the past few months. Healing is not a fun processes, and even clean breaks have many painful moments. As time continues to roll on I constantly remind myself it can only get better. Everything happens was for a reason. Someday I hope to understand. For now I will take a deep breath and be thankful I remembered before I wrote the words and pressed send.
Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.