Sometimes I have a feeling I am forgetting to do something, or I’m supposed to be somewhere. It is very unsetting and a little confusing. I am sure it is leftover feelings of the life I thought I would have, and I wish they would stop.
It is strange to think how different my life could be right now. Who knows what good and bad things could have happened. I would hope if things had gone differently, misery wouldn’t have settled so quickly in our relationship, but I guess I will never know. I am glad for the mystery, because it means I don’t have to feel any more pain or hurt caused by him. I do not have to be disappointed.
I think somewhere in the back of my mind I am still wondering what could have been, but with all I know now it is impossible to think of my life going any other way. No one wants this pain, but I am confident that whatever is coming will be more amazing than I could have ever imagined and worth all the hurt.
Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.