I’m not much for makeup. It’s fun sometimes, but for the most part I don’t see it being worth the effort. My one exception is mascara. I love mascara. It makes my blue eyes pop, and simply makes me feel pretty. On the day to day I don’t care about covering up my scars and blemishes. It feels like I can never get everything to look ok without it taking far too long anyway.
For my wedding I picked out an assortment of makeup. One thing every bride must have is waterproof mascara. I was 100% sure I was going to cry that day. Silly me, I thought they would be tears of joy, not pain. On that day my waterproof mascara stayed packed away with my other makeup, but soon it would be my best friend.
In the past few weeks my waterproof mascara has made me feel confident. I hold myself together pretty well on the day to day. I save my tears for times that I am alone. Many are shed while I write, edit and re-write. But I feel like I live in constant fear of running into someone who doesn’t know, or having something come over me so quickly that I can’t contain it. For the moments of fear I wear waterproof mascara.
I found myself in a situation not long ago where I did not use my trusty waterproof mascara and teary eyes did come. Fortunantly I was able to maintain enough composure to not have too much of an issue, but it cemented my fear. I’m not sure how long I will be using my waterproof mascara. I guess someday I will be brave enough to venture off into less secure mascara, but for now I will stick to what makes me feel more comfortable.
Tomorrow will be a little bit easier and I will become a stronger me everyday.